Matchweek 16

Welcome back to Footy ReMarcs where like Gianni Infantino we don't take football too seriously...unless you pay me to. Maybe I should redact that just in case he's reading this. No. Today I feel brave.

Just a quick one this week because I stayed up late on Saturday to watch Killers of the Flower Moon and I am still shattered.

We are approaching Christmas! My wife and I have just done a big clear-out of the kids stuff to make room for new Christmas gifts we will be throwing out next year. Band Aid is back in the music charts, possibly one of the worst songs of all time innmy opinion. "And there wont be snow in Africa this Christmas time". Exhibit A - Mount Kilimanjaro. Also, I'm sure snow is the least of their worries. There wont be snow in most of the UK this Christmas time either. Besides, according to Google, 41.5% of Africa practices Islam and don't celebrate Christmas. What's all this got to do with football? Nothing, just an old man ranting, sorry.

Congratulations to Arsenal's Ben White on his engagement to Selena Gomez.

BREAKING NEWS Chelsea's Mykhalio Mudryk has failed a drug test and is facing a lengthy ban. I'm looking forward to seeing the leaked video of his foul mouthed rant about Klopp and Liverpool.

Manchester United left it late to snatch a derby win against Manchester City, Fulham held leaders Liverpool to a draw and Chelsea closed the gap to top spot to just two points after beating Brentford.

Results below:

Saturday 14th December

Arsenal 0 - 0 Everton - Pick-OfTheBunch-Ford.

Liverpool 2 - 2 Fulham - Andy RobertsOff.

Newcastle 4 - 0 Leicester - Anthony Gord-On Fire.

Wolves 1 - 2 Ipswich - Gary O'No.

Nottingham Forest 2 - 1 Aston Villa - Martinez heroics not enough for Villans.

Sunday 15th

Brighton 1 - 3 Crystal Palace - The A23 is Red and Blue.

Man City 1 - 2 Manchester United - Manchester is Red.

Chelsea 2 - 1 Brentford - West London is Blue.

Southampton 0 - 5 Tottenham - Russel MartOut.

Monday 16th December

Bournemouth 1 - 1 West Ham - Ün-believab-al.

That it for this week, we'll be back Saturday 28th December for matchweeks 17 & 18. Don't forget to tell your middle manager, mother and mob boss about the blog, follow us on Threads, and have a very Merry Christmas!!