Matchweek 33

Welcome back to FootyReMarcs where we take football as seriously as Lee Dixon takes throw ins.

The world mourns a huge loss this week. A great man and character who took up his post in 2012 and has held it with esteem despite controversies from within his sacred circle. He has accomplished literal miracles and endured crushing tragedies. Some called him a maverick, they said that he changed the way people thought about the the Church of Grass Roots Football, and that he was always ready to party of you brought your vodka and your Charlie. Yes, this week we mourn the loss of Jamie Vardy who today announced that he will leave Leicester in the summer...why, who did you think I meant?

The Premier League is all but secured for Liverpool. They just need a point against 16th placed Tottenham, a team who's fans cheered when they lost to Man City costing their rivals Arsenal the title in a previous season. I am not suggesting that Spurs will roll over, I'm suggesting that they would never stand a chance against Liverpool. It has been an incredible achievement for Arne Slot in his fist season managing in the Premier League!

Leeds & Burnley both secured promotion back to the Premier League. Ok. Highlight that, CTRL+C, File, New Blog, Name "Matchweek 34 2026", CTRL+V, a little change there "Leeds & Burnley have both been relegated from the Premier League". Perfect. Saved myself 30 seconds in a years time.

John Cena made history becoming a 17 time World Champion at WrestleMania 41. Cena has beaten Ric Flair's 16 world title winning record, the first of which came in 1981 a mere 20 years after Spurs won their last first division title. John Cena's famous catchphrase "you cant see me" is said to be PGMOL's slogan for next season. Tired sweaty men rolling around on the floor isn't the only thing that professional wrestling and Premier League football have in common. Arsenal fans will remember Wolve's Mosquera choke slamming Kai Havertz on matchday one!

BY GAWD HAVERTZ IS BROKEN IN HALF!

Tommy Robinson has lost his appeal over prison sentencing. He had no appeal to me in the first place to be honest. Not football related but had to be said.

Premier league results below!

Saturday 19th April

Brentford 4 - 2 Brighton - Joao Red-ro

Crystal Palace 0 - 0 Bournemouth - Chris Rich-Reds.

Everton 0 - 2 Man City - It'll be O'Reilly on the night.

West Ham 1 - 1 Southampton - Need an equaliser? U-got-it-chukwu.

Aston Villa 4 - 1 Newcastle - Burn for Burn.

Sunday 20th April

Fulham 1 - 2 Chelsea - West London is Blue.

Ipswich 0 - 4 Arsenal - Leif it out mate!

Manchester United 0 - 1 Wolves - Hold my Sarabia.

Leicester 0 - 1 Liverpool - Foxes fall.

Monday 21st April

Tottenham 1 - 2 Nottingham Forest - Ange-ry Postecoglu.

Tuesday 22nd April

Man City 2 - 1 Aston Villa - Sliva lining.

Wednesday 23rd April

Arsenal 2 - 2 Crystal Palace - CrystaLiverpool Palace.

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